06.17.19. HA! Turns out my Day 15 of #100DaysOfSummer blog post segued like a well cued song on the radio for Day 16 Devo in Lysa TerKeurst's EMBRACED! So, I skipped posting and waited for today.
If you've just jumped into my blog series, know that I am spending 100 days reading her 100 devotions found in the EMBRACED book and asking God to deposit into my spirit and spark something that flies tandem with that day's devo. I'm not rewording her daily devo, but allowing God to bring another fresh word into my focus.
And, as an added bonus, in prayer and praise before reading the EMBRACED devo, I place myself in a position of hearing God speak. Although I don't ever recall in my life hearing His audible voice, sometimes, words and phrases land in my mind. Sometimes, a knowing happens. I have spent my time just 5 minutes quietly thanking Him for stuff while at other times, I have walked and worshiped for a lot longer. Any time spent in God's presence is time well spent.
This morning, within the non-profit/ministry, MVP Leader Group, my hubby and I launched, we decided to declare Psalm 34. I chose to use The Message version to pray each verse aloud while the tune "Surrounded (Fight My Battles)" written by Michael W. Smith was on repeat on my Spotify account.
When I started declaring the verses, I was seated. By verse 7 I was up on my feet doing battle for the lives of my family, friends, and preachers and preacher's wives! If you haven't read Psalm 34:7, lately, let me just let ya in on a promise: God sets up a circle of protection around us while we pray!
Woah -- the picture in my brain is that all of heaven snapped to attention and God commissioned one of those big guys (or two) to guard me while I was wielding the sword and the shield! "Boys, our little princess-warrior is running to the front lines. Let's provide air support."
Here's the dealio, when we spend time in a position of openness reading His Words written down (the Bible) and in prayer, He is faithful to guide our focus -then and later- for making decisions.
Lysa lays out some straight up truth and wisdom for "Chasing Down Our Decisions" using Proverbs 27:12 as a springboard for her Day 17 devo. She offers, "Our decisions aren't just isolated choices. Our decisions point our lives in the direction we're about to head." Good decisions head us to a good place. Likewise, poor decisions lead to a destination that tends to cost us more in the long run. Read Lysa's Day 17 devo of chasing down a decision before it's made.
I choose to spend time listening to the Lord for good decisions and good directions which have a positive effect/affect (I always get those confused.) on my life for the future. It's doing life with God for His name to be great instead of mine.
BTW: You can get EMBRACED: 100 Devotions to Know God is Holding You Close on Kindle, Audiobook, Hardcover or MP3 CD on Amazon!
06.05.19. I loved reading Lysa's devotion, today. In it she spoke about decisions and deep knowings, and the courageous yes and confident no.
I loved the three questions she posed to the young mom to help her to make a God-directed decision. Pearls of Wisdom to be desired.
Doubt definitely can cause one to hold her breath for a hot minute while weighing the details.
Doubt has caused the same reaction in me. Reasons for my personal bouts with doubt:
- I truly don't know the answer.
- I can sense how important a decision is to the other person.
- I don't trust the outcome.
There are topics for which knowledge and wisdom have trained my brain. There have been situations when I am totally clueless, but I have an opinion. Don't we all? Intuition, gut feeling and knowing are easy dance partners for me with daily decisions.
Where it gets tricky is the hard, life-effecting call demanding a decision and there doesn't seem to be an easy solve.
On August 23rd, T and I will celebrate 34 years! We've come along way. In those early years, it took the goofy decision to strengthen our future, decision-making skills. It was a costly lesson. One day a similar opportunity presented itself. Well, we were no longer dumb little ducks. Not only had the previous misstep provide a bitter memory, it had taught us to invite God into the process.
Colossians Chapter 3 is full of the good stuff. Rich with practical tips, each verse lays out how to live a life full with Christ and live fully with one another. Verse 15 was where we decided to hang our hat.
"Let the peace of Christ control your hearts..."
After the goofy decision, wisdom taught us to pray, sleep on it and upon waking, encourage peace to lead the way. If there's no peace, there's no moving forward.
The scripture ends with "...and be thankful." Can I tell you how thankful I have been to not be burdened down with regret?
And, when peace had us to seek counsel, trusted leaders provided valuable, God-led insight.
In the Day 5 devo of EMBRACED, Lysa TerKeurst states, "God has woven into us the ability to discern what is best if we're closely following Him." Now, there's the key! We must spend time with Him to simply know. Our spirit will recognize His Spirit with each decision to trust and follow-through. Make the wise decision to invite Him.
“If you don’t want us to be in the ministry, anymore, just say the word. Right now, you make the decision. What’s it gonna be?”
We had been doing ministry, together, as singles longer than we had been doing ministry, together, as husband and wife. Any couple with years of marriage to their credit knows, those first years of wedded bliss can be peppered with heated battles of the wills which are typically silly spats that “old married couples” just blow off because they have learned which battles to pick. Adding the stresses of ministry has the potential of becoming polarizing. But, as young couples do what young couples do, the emotions of the moment ebb, forgiveness gently flows and the make-up is great! Huggy, kissy, lovey!
But, not this night.
Together, staring at the ceiling in the dark bedroom, both of us had had it. It, being the frustration with the ministry and with each other in the ministry, had exploded into a huge argument. My hubby wanted peace. I did, too. He was torn between tension of the calling pulling on the home. I was torn in half.
Perhaps, it was from holding my tongue and internalizing while church people felt the freedom of expressing their displeasure and opinions. Perhaps, it was from high expectations from the leadership while I did not even live up to my own. Perhaps, it was insecurity from the past stepping on my heels. Perhaps, it was all of these and more in a perfect storm converging at that hormonal time of the month.
Regardless, there it was. “Right now, you make the decision. What’s it gonna be?”
Acutely aware our future was in my hands, I lay there with eyes unblinking staring at the ceiling in our dark bedroom. My mouth was dry. I wanted out. I wanted us to be a regular couple who attend church, together, on the weekends and some Wednesdays. I wanted to be the normal couple who work 9-to-5 jobs and leave the stress of work stacked up on their desks until Monday morning. I imagined we could be the idyllic couple who hand-in-hand leave church on Sundays to happily spend the remainder of the day at the lake and not give one thought to church finances or who decided to leave because of something said in a pulpit. I wanted my husband to drive a new sports car, if he wanted to, without repercussion that a preacher should not be making that kind of money. And, I wanted to not be told to not wear a new dress on Easter so others felt better about not having a new dress. For heaven’s sake, my double-pierced ears are not of the devil! Nobody else lives like this… why do we have to?
Staring up in the dark, it seemed like forever as I remembered the personal calling to ministry I felt as a student in summer church camp and the many conversations with the guy I was going to marry as we dreamed about life and ministry, together. I was dreamy about him and how the preacher life would play out. As ugly as that night’s argument felt, it was a revelation of how differently men and women think and how immature I was.
I swallowed and licked my lips. Somehow feeling the weight of the future on my chest, but knowing the future would be with the love of my life, I whispered my decision. Then, my young hubby reached for my hand in the quiet, darkness and prayed for us.
That early marriage, dark room decision made so many years ago has been strengthened in the repetitions of doing the work of ministry and in living through some of the worst times in our life. From then to now, we have done it, together. And, we have stayed, together.
Together is a word tapping a deep joy in my soul.
Honestly, surveying back, the greatest of struggles have been the blindsiding situations slamming into our lives like a Black Rhinoceros ramming into a clown car. It always happens at a time when both my hubby and I were physically tired and spiritually sapped. I am thankful for a man who asks, “Have you had your Jesus-time, this morning?” because he understands the enemy goes after the weakling. As old-fashioned as it may sound, we read the Word, together, and listen to the Word preached, together, thereby strengthening our spirits.
We work well, together, my preacher-man and I. Not everyone has this luxury. Many don’t see it as a blessing. Where he ends, I begin and vice versa. Even though ministry locations and job descriptions change, we hustle hard observing, processing and doing the work.
Then, after the Word and the work, we rest and play, together. Sometimes, it’s a quiet evening by the fire reading or it’s hiking over rocks and roots discovering a new trail or it’s a tall twist ice cream cone at our local drive-in. Joy is sweeter when there is peace and ice cream in the marriage!
It’s been said for every struggle is an even greater joy. I don’t know. I haven’t been counting. What I do know is that God has given me joy in creating a wonderful marriage with the man I love. And, we can face any struggle in or out of ministry, together.
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This blog post first appeared on SANCTUARY | Ministry to Ministry Wives founded by friend of the family and sister-in-ministry, Bridgette Tomlin.
Bridgette's goal is to connect ministry wives and ultimately end the isolation we tend to back ourselves into when loneliness and stress crush our spirits.
If you are a preacher's wife, a wife on a church or other ministry staff, visit Sanctuary to redefine what sanctuary and connect!
