100 Days of Summer 81-90/100

08.29.19.  Self-control. Are you kidding me [more of statement than a question].

Since last weekend, most of the devos Lysa TerKeurst has covered in the EMBRACED book circle around allowing the Word at work in me to control me, because it's changing me from the deep core of the soul outward to my reactions to strangers, family, friends and that other group of beings who have no category with the exception of they get on my one last nerve. My solace is that category is small.

sigh.

My blood started simmering, today, while in a waiting room. A gloriously deserted waiting room. I plug in my cell in the only outlet available and hidden in the room. I retrieve my water bottle and a novel from my roped KAVU®, where all sorts of personal luxuries exist for an extended stay in the waiting room, and settle in for an enjoyable, quiet reading session.

Then, just as the young bride on St. Simon's Island, Georgia, is to plight her troth to the handsome groom from Scotland, he swaggers by and cusses to another lady who just came around the corner and works in this building. Then, he slouches into a chair across the once-empty room and continues to filth & foul about things that only the miserable filth & foul loudly about. 

My head is down and my hat's brim shields my rolling eyes as I continue to refocus on the bridal party's dinner and the many toasts offered up by the loving father of the bride.

He mutters something about fixing or painting something very slowly and making it an all-day project because this is his Friday. With that he starts walking down the hall. My joy is fleeting as he pauses and stands smack dab in front of her whispering in a throaty sound as he makes, what appeared to me, a covert grab at what did not belong to him. Did I really see a sexual harassment just take place? Didn't he just talk about himself having a wife?

Squirming from hip to hip, crossing and uncrossing my legs, I pray, "God, he makes me sick. Make him go away before I stand up." They both move across the hall where I cannot see their activity, but still hear that low, muffled voice. Then, another employee walks down the hall causing the two to separate. I'm just looking around for a supervisorly-ish person to report that bad man's bad behavior. Not a single camera is mounted. Not a single person with authority shows up. Again, they separate, but meander down the hall in the same direction.

I decide that the first chance I get, when she's alone, to let her know she is not being respected and can do better and neither one of them should be conducting themself in this manner in this place...MY QUIET, DESERTED, PUBLIC, WAITING AND READING PLACE!

I never got the opportunity. How I wanted that opportunity with every indignant fiber of my simmering self. I really wanted to verbally kick some tail, today. Honestly, I wasn't sure how he would react to my reaction and I really didn't want him to filth & foul at me, which is most likely what would have happened as I tried to put him in his place. Would I have felt triumphant in my righteous piety?

Ok. So. Back to the Lysa's devotions. Like a sharpened arrow zinged into my brain, instantly I'm reminded of Hebrews 4:12, "For the Word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it slices cleanly through dividing soul and spirit, bone and marrow; its surgical precision separates my thoughts and attitudes and motivations." Scriptures point me back to self-control allowing the living and active Word to be at work in me to control all of me. 

Don't think that I believe God intended for us to be doormats and cowards shrinking away from injustice. I believe He wants us to use wisdom and lean into His voice for guidance.

My blood still simmers thinking about today. But, I know that God's voice whether sensed, heard or written down is working in me and for me. 

Birthday Wisdom

06.28.19.  I almost typed 06.28.64. Today is my birthday! "Double nickles" is what a friend said when I told her I'm 55. You better believe this senior citizen asked for the 10% discount on the first purchase that offered it. 

Yesterday, in the EMBRACED book, Lysa TerKeurst asked the question, "What holds the key to your heart?" and I paused.

For the past two days, Ephesians 3:14-21 MSG has been my altar call. 

"God, I ask you strengthen me with Your glorious inner strength, Lord. Plant my feet firmly so that I can stand with others to fully experience the extravagance of Your faithful love to know its full height, depth and width and length. I ask for a full life that is full of You and fully Yours. I ask to see miracles and be part of miracles by Your Spirit working in me and through me." 

(cue the tune "Yes and Amen" by Jesus Culture)

Have you ever prayed the Word using each verse as your personal message to God and from Him to your soul? 

Every morning, my soul feels like that vibrant flower in need of a drink of cool, fresh water. Head and shoulders bowed just slightly from doing life in daily elements that spend her supply of energy until she thirsts for more of His Voice-Written-Down. Then, with face turning upward, she fills up with the goodness that strengthens her to fully and gloriously be who God created.

If you are looking for sage wisdom from an old, experienced one, this is it: I would encourage you to ask yourself Lysa's question and ask God to help you discover the answer as you pray His Word. He promises to hear our cry. 

In Wisdom's Time-Out

06.26.19.  Wisdom.

When I pray for His wisdom, it is imperative I know my own motivation. Is it to hoard wisdom? That's goofy. Is it for selfish pride? That's not godly. Wisdom of the Lord. Wisdom for the moment. Not to be the smartest person in the room, but to know His direction. To consult the Lord and know His thoughts and, then, act or speak or be still and quiet. Why do I pray for wisdom?
I need wisdom when I speak with people.I need wisdom when I make decisions. I need wisdom for ministry and work responsibilities. I need wisdom in the emotional moments when it would be easier for me to knee-jerk react. I need wisdom to know myself.

"...make your ear attentive to wisdom and incline your heart to understanding. If you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding and if you search for it like silver and hidden treasures, THEN, you will have a reverent respect and trust in the Lord, because He gives wisdom and speaks knowledge for us to hear and treasure." (Proverbs 2:1-6 SAMtrans)

This weekend had been one day longer with friends, ministry and travel. Engaging and fun.

But, by yesterday, I woke up feeling tired and stiff. Eager to write and catch-up on posting my thoughts from the EMBRACED book, I started. There was plenty of time, but my head felt disconnected as if it didn't want to crank. After several attempts and coffee and prayer, I pushed my journal and computer aside. No sense of getting frustrated. Move on.

Am I the only one who needs wisdom to know when to push through or when to push aside without guilt or self-condemnation?

Not conscious of the wisdom of the moment, I made something to eat and rested my body and brain with a National Geographic Channel recording about the National Parks Service. In case you place to much attention on my viewing selection, know that's not what I'm driving at.

Sometimes, the wisest thing we can do is rest our body and mind. Why fight it when fatigue clearly is the victor? I would like to think that a residue of wisdom was clinging to the frontal lobe of my brain like a kind of spiritual lichen clinging to the northern side of a tree and, causing me to wisely retreat to the couch for a couple of hours. 

After learning about the birth of the parks service and a couple more episodes of the diverse beauty in our National Parks, I found my feet and brain and moved with more clarity. Wisdom had set me down and propped me up in a much needed time-out.

Notes from Lysa TerKeurst and my missing EMBRACED posts:

How am I spending my soul?
It's good to use wisdom and knowledge and an understanding of your resource capacity to access your decisions. (This "resource capacity" dealio, by the way, is brilliant!)
Not every opportunity was meant to be my assignment. (Yes! Sam, pay attention!)

Her thoughts on wisdom were setting me up for me to make a wise choice.

Learning about myself has been this month's reading focus using The Road Back to You: An

Enneagram Journey to Self-Discovery. If you have not read the book, I encourage you to put it on your list and study it, soon. If you have explored the book, then you are cued to just how wonderfully we've been created! For those interested, I'm either a 7 Wing 8 or an 8 Wing 7. Yep, my motor runs hot... until it doesn't and I need to engage that part of wisdom that instructs me to rest.


We have opportunities every single day to let wisdom guide us, if we ask, listen and obey.

Are the Pistols Loaded?

06.19.19.  In a few posts from the past, I have blogged about fear. Although fear manifests itself in different ways, they can all be traced back to that stubborn root. 

Although the paralyzing type of fear does not typically seize me, my spirit will lock down in an unhealthy pattern, sometimes, when an old insecurity tries to sneak its way into my thoughts. I am learning to flip on the porchlight to expose fear for what it is, an invader. 

If you tend to wrestle with fear (worry, anxiety, etc.), perhaps the following reference from Worry: The Big Scary Shadow may serve you:

1. Relax. Breathe.
2. Refrain from giving-in to this crippling shadow-monster.
3. Recognize you're in a negative thought mode and retrace your steps back to the source by asking, "Where did this start?"
4. Remind yourself of 2 Corinthians 10:5, "Casting down imaginations and every thing that sets itself up against the knowledge of God and taking captive (arresting, disabling) every thought to make it obedient to Christ."

In the EMBRACED Day 19 Devo, Lysa TerKeurst wrestles with this nemesis by reminding herself of other God-breathed words of strength found in Isaiah 43:1, Romans 8:38-39, 1 Peter 5:7 and, one of my faves, 2 Timothy 1:7.

God gave us a spirit

not of fear but

of power and love and self-control. 

(2 Timothy 1:7 ESV)

Looking up other versions or translations of this scripture for those three gifts (power, love

and self-control), yielded words like bold, strong, loving, sensible, wise, and sound-judgment any of which could be inserted synonymously.

My response to fear or insecurity is action. Not the good action. Without thinking I attempt to control the situation or trust in my own strength. Sidenote, "without thinking" should be a warning to pause and regroup. Oh no, not me. I run forward with pistols that should be blazing, but in my haste, I didn't load the bullets. That's very bold, but not wise and definitely not recommended. 

Trusting myself is just that. Bold, not wise. I'm not intentionally being disobedient, but my startled reaction to fear or insecurity causes me to go rogue. My prayer is to be wise in the gifts He gave, boldness with love and wisdom. Wisdom reminds me to trust God with my weakness, instead of wrestling with Him. 

Are we alike in this? Aren't we all a work in progress?

Time Well Spent

06.17.19. HA! Turns out my Day 15 of #100DaysOfSummer blog post segued like a well cued song on the radio for Day 16 Devo in Lysa TerKeurst's EMBRACED! So, I skipped posting and waited for today.

If you've just jumped into my blog series, know that I am spending 100 days reading her 100 devotions found in the EMBRACED book and asking God to deposit into my spirit and spark something that flies tandem with that day's devo. I'm not rewording her daily devo, but allowing God to bring another fresh word into my focus.

And, as an added bonus, in prayer and praise before reading the EMBRACED devo, I place myself in a position of hearing God speak. Although I don't ever recall in my life hearing His audible voice, sometimes, words and phrases land in my mind. Sometimes, a knowing happens. I have spent my time just 5 minutes quietly thanking Him for stuff while at other times, I have walked and worshiped for a lot longer. Any time spent in God's presence is time well spent. 

This morning, within the non-profit/ministry, MVP Leader Group, my hubby and I launched, we decided to declare Psalm 34. I chose to use The Message version to pray each verse aloud while the tune "Surrounded (Fight My Battles)" written by Michael W. Smith was on repeat on my Spotify account.

When I started declaring the verses, I was seated. By verse 7 I was up on my feet doing battle for the lives of my family, friends, and preachers and preacher's wives! If you haven't read Psalm 34:7, lately, let me just let ya in on a promise: God sets up a circle of protection around us while we pray! 

Woah -- the picture in my brain is that all of heaven snapped to attention and God commissioned one of those big guys (or two) to guard me while I was wielding the sword and the shield! "Boys, our little princess-warrior is running to the front lines. Let's provide air support."

Here's the dealio, when we spend time in a position of openness reading His Words written down (the Bible) and in prayer, He is faithful to guide our focus -then and later- for making decisions. 

Lysa lays out some straight up truth and wisdom for "Chasing Down Our Decisions" using Proverbs 27:12 as a springboard for her Day 17 devo. She offers, "Our decisions aren't just isolated choices. Our decisions point our lives in the direction we're about to head." Good decisions head us to a good place. Likewise, poor decisions lead to a destination that tends to cost us more in the long run. Read Lysa's Day 17 devo of chasing down a decision before it's made.

I choose to spend time listening to the Lord for good decisions and good directions which have a positive effect/affect (I always get those confused.) on my life for the future. It's doing life with God for His name to be great instead of mine.

BTW: You can get EMBRACED: 100 Devotions to Know God is Holding You Close on Kindle, Audiobook, Hardcover or MP3 CD on Amazon! 

Decisions, Doubt and Dumb Little Ducks

06.05.19.  I loved reading Lysa's devotion, today. In it she spoke about decisions and deep knowings, and the courageous yes and confident no. 

I loved the three questions she posed to the young mom to help her to make a God-directed decision. Pearls of Wisdom to be desired.

Doubt definitely can cause one to hold her breath for a hot minute while weighing the details. 

Doubt has caused the same reaction in me. Reasons for my personal bouts with doubt: 

• I truly don't know the answer.
• I can sense how important a decision is to the other person. 
• I don't trust the outcome. 

There are topics for which knowledge and wisdom have trained my brain. There have been situations when I am totally clueless, but I have an opinion. Don't we all?  Intuition, gut feeling and knowing are easy dance partners for me with daily decisions.

Where it gets tricky is the hard, life-effecting call demanding a decision and there doesn't seem to be an easy solve.

On August 23rd, T and I will celebrate 34 years! We've come along way. In those early years, it took the goofy decision to strengthen our future, decision-making skills. It was a costly lesson. One day a similar opportunity presented itself. Well, we were no longer dumb little ducks. Not only had the previous misstep provide a bitter memory, it had taught us to invite God into the process.

Colossians Chapter 3 is full of the good stuff. Rich with practical tips, each verse lays out how to live a life full with Christ and live fully with one another. Verse 15 was where we decided to hang our hat. 

"Let the peace of Christ control your hearts..." 

After the goofy decision, wisdom taught us to pray, sleep on it and upon waking, encourage peace to lead the way. If there's no peace, there's no moving forward. 

The scripture ends with "...and be thankful." Can I tell you how thankful I have been to not be burdened down with regret? 

And, when peace had us to seek counsel, trusted leaders provided valuable, God-led insight.

In the Day 5 devo of EMBRACED, Lysa TerKeurst states, "God has woven into us the ability to discern what is best if we're closely following Him." Now, there's the key! We must spend time with Him to simply know. Our spirit will recognize His Spirit with each decision to trust and follow-through. Make the wise decision to invite Him.

A Mom Hack!

Who else does this? 

Finally, you get to shop without your child(ren) and the grocery cart (a.k.a. buggy or basket) is your personal realm for a short amount of time! You're not having to balance your purse on your shoulder because the kid seat is empty. 

With all of this freedom, you may turn your back on the cart for just a second to read ingredients or smell a candle or squeeze an avocado. In that blip of time a ne'er-do-well can make off with your favorite bag relieving you of your valuables. I gotta tell ya, it's a pain to replace your driver's license, debit card, keys to house, car, work, and your favorite lipstick that's been discontinued.

Buckle that Bag! It's a first line of defense! My mom does it and I follow in her wise footsteps!